Gathering Of Obscurity
The Pain of Humiliation
1. Across Pain and Loss...
An anecdote of shudder, who had made my brain seemed mad.
I got the choice, but how to choose when both are bad.
All my emotions are gathering in obscurities.
The light had left my mind, the sun got black like the night.
They tried to break my neck, my attitude, my beliefs.
They want to create a marionette,
which is dancing without the charakter of it's own.
But they forgot that I had to suffer in helplessness,
dropped my foible blossoms in canyons of anaesthesia!
Melodies of darkness, for whom they shall fade?
Loneliness and privacy I didn't want to create.
Remembering the sleepless ones, hunted with pain.
Their eyes subsidered with tears, daybreakless.
But sometimes destiny borrows vitality,
falling in darkness of my own sympathy.
There I am in a boulevard of broken dreams,
but how to walk across pain and loss,
when the streets are ending here.
2. Colours of Black
A new time has begun,
but it's a deception that I had won.
Critics and conflicts bring no decisions,
freedom and peace are morbid visions.
Lies upon lies, like acid rain,
creep in people call it game.
Subhuman terror, corruption and pain,
the search for justice ends in my brain.
The Colours of Black are creating the pain. (Look in the sky, see a time to die.)
The Colours of Black are invading my veins.
Shades of grey breaking my neck. (Shades of grey, run away!
I try to detach them, but they always come back.
Beyond this time there's a chance.
Let us build with truth a flange.
A mirror of deception in front of you
Try to break, break it in two.
To eradicate this evil here,
I care for myself, I show no fear.
The time is short, survive the fight,
I try to find the saving light.
3. A Dying Soul in Suffering
Escape from the inner self,
fear of being alone.
Conception of death equal the end,
a deeply fall in emptiness.
Shadows are displacing my mind,
pain shatters in silence.
I am faced with isolation,
I am crying endlessly.
Haze of anger and dispair,
I'm wandering to obscurity.
Be aware of your fears,
as shares of your soul!
Shall I rest in peace for eternity?
Am I sleeping or only cursed?
A dying Soul in Suffering.
Fear still, still remains,
day by day of my existence.
Nocturnal silence as I fall asleep,
anxiety of morbid dreams.
Revelate insanity, perhaps the way to be.
Revenge of unforgotten feats.
A sensless waste, waste of time?
4. In Suspence of Delight
Crawling gently up the extremities,
like tiny current strikes flashing, firing and freeze.
Vacancy will be filled up with chains of ideas,
thoughtlessness is now debauchery.
I'm fading in spheres of unknown,
seeing colours of plain diversity.
Abandoned in a void of nothingness,
my mind is reaching eternity.
Every step I take, a drifting away,
beyond this world which seems ridiculous.
Shares of dreames, are gathering in one,
in suspense of delight, receptivity as I named it.
Swallowed in other dimensions of beeing!
Weeded in another galaxy of seeing!
I opened the door called oddity,
my mind decayed, embittered in gloom.
Dark vapour streams, mental vortices,
Wailing of subconscious or paling of bloom?
5. With Every Tear a Dream
I drive around and feel so lonely,
in my hands I hold the fragments of my broken dreams.
I see them turning to dust and once again I realize
life isn't as easy as it seems.
Thoughts are flashing by, I shiver and shed a tear,
I close my eyes and feel that pain again.
These thoughts I put back in a forgotten tunnel in my brain
but they will reappear.
Sadness creeps upon me, I need someone to set me free,
and my broken dreams are replaced by lost dignity.
The tears I've cried, the girl that lied, solutions they are out of sight
No way to turn and no way out, my self - hate grows, and strangles my soul
I fear myself for my fear of beeing, but some illusions make me living.
The world of joy is far away and yet so near to touch.
I start to create my new dreams I have not lost trust in mankind.
I lean back, enjoy life as it is and the way it drags me down.
I drive around and feel so lonley,
in my hands I hold the fragments of my broken dreams.
I see them turning to dust and realize that I lose
with every tear a dream
6. Anachronism
I was deeply hurten, in a former existance.
Always kneeling down, playing the dog.
Putting myself down, for a life full of lies.
I was too weak, I paid the price.
But who's to blame?
I let them put salt in my wounds,
'cause anxiety drove me mad.
My emotions have been abused, I was the rat.
I rose my head just to show my throat.
Gulping my anger, fear exploded.
But who's to blame?
They spoiled my life.
When I look back, I see myself crying.
I've nearly gone insane, strong was the wish to die.
I made up my mind and my thought became clear.
Now I rise my head to stand upon them without fear.
I changed myself, realizing society's mistake.
Fucked up hedonism, I know what counts.
True friends are few in number,
I bust that punks that caused my pain.
Now I stand tall 'cause I washed away
the stain.
7. Destiny's Mistake
Is it a dream or reality, a world of illusions, where I live in?
Shall I mourn or celebrate, weep or laugh?
My emotions are like a labyrinth, where I can't find a way out!
My heart is cold like stone, my soul is burning with sorrow.
Memories like black shadows in my brain.
An endless path to nowhere,
spread with stones of hope and tormental uncertainty.
Endless love turns to funereal hate.
The believe in accuracy is lost.
I'm dying of jealousy.
Ficticious truth, we lied to ourselves.
Ways of destiny, direction indeterminate.
Foremost now I realize, it's over forever.
The fate conveyed you to him,
I can give you nothing more.
Never again I can look into your eyes.
I feel, a piece of me is dying.
It was destiny's mistake to divide us,
but I decide for myself to end this paragraph,
and I define the new sense of life.
All wounds are cured, I summon up new courage
and let life set its pace.
8. Emotions Lost in Damnation
I am wandering towards points of uncertainty.
Aimless destinations, enchanged by solitude.
I abhore these dark days of sorrow and pain,
where vitality declines to ash and dust.
The trees of the forests once shining
in colours of spreading beauty,
now turned to sombress, and withered in those
days of transitoriness.
With eyes of suffering and emotions of insanity,
volition dominate desperation and obscurity.
I stand ablaze, abnegation of arrangement,
arrested in nothingness and hate.
The coldness of Winter,
I have never felt so intensivly.
A burning fire in winterfall,
feeding my sadness.
As I fall asleep and awaken,
in a bitter reality.
9. ...into Etherial Drifting
"I want to reach a changing point.
Melancholy overcomes me - again and again.
Lonleiness takes me away to my own world.
It's the power of my depression in my head."
I close my eyes just to dream a while in another sphere.
Smooth I take a deep breath whereby my brain gets clear.
Depression turns to gentle vitality,
but oddity has grown insane.
My attitude seems to confuse, but my charakter remains unseen.
But I had to learn, my soul is stronger.
I close my eyes just to dream a while in another sphere.
Smooth I take a deep breath whereby my brain gets clear.
Here I am, come to life again!
Illusions get real, I show what I feel!
It is a feeling I cannot describe
It builts up my heart, fulfills me with pride.
Night after night is wadded in ecstasy.
It is not a dream, it's right, pure reality.
Just like delight, addictive for my own.
Just like heroin for my brain and my soul.
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